Save the Ocelots!

(While reading a library book about adorable, beautiful ocelots...)

Me [reading]: "...Ocelots used to be hunted for their coats."

Elizabeth: "Oh! That's not good. Go to a store and get a coat, people!!!"

The Big Time

Elizabeth: "Mommy. Here's something we are learning about in school, and I'm not even sure you know about it.... EXPANDED NOTATION."

Ahem...

Me: "Hold on, I gotta pee..."

Elizabeth: [sarcastically] "P? P??? You can't 'P' that's a letter!"

Me: "OK. I need to urinate."

Elizabeth: ".......That's not a word!"

In charge, for real

Elizabeth: "I'm going to play soccer, and my mom and dad are the coaches, in charge, for real. My dad is the assistant coach, and my mom is going to be the real leader!"

E's buddy: "Why is your mom going to be the leader?"

Elizabeth: "Just because. She chose to."

She knows me

(We bought a used book at the Milwaukie Daze parade, where the library was having a sale. Later that day....)

Me: "Want to read this book we got today?"

Elizabeth: "No."

Me: "Oh... did you want this book?"

Elizabeth: "No. I just wanted you to be happy that we got a book."

Ha!

(A kid rides his motorcycle past our house for the frillionth time...)

Elizabeth: "I bet I know where he got that motorcycle.... at the Stupid Shop."

Not a food group

Me: "What you you like with your salmon?"

Elizabeth: "Hmmm... can I have a candy side?"

Time to pretend

"I know! How about, I'm a turkey....."

You know I will be!

"I want to show you a trick. It's very hard, but be impressed with it."

Pencil me in

Me: "So, I wanted to let you know: I'm going to go to dinner with my girlfriends and then see a movie tomorrow night. Just wanted you to be aware, so you're not surprised."

Elizabeth: "Hold on, let me write this down." [Scribbles on a note-pad & mumbles] "....Mommy.....girl...friends.... OK!"