Good Back-up Plan

(Grama & Grampa will be visiting our California family after Christmas... and you know what that means!)

Grama: "When I'm in California, I'll probably go to a Disneyland gift shop and bring you back a little something."

Elizabeth: "Yes, and if you forget, call me and I will remind you."


At least I didn't mention that it is made out of cheese

(While driving to preschool on a brilliant, sunny day...)

Me: "Oh, look! There's the moon!"

Elizabeth: "It's melting!"

Me: "That's just the part of the moon that's in shadow."

Elizabeth: "Yeah... but, it's also melting."


The Sudoku Channel is On

Me: "What's Daddy doing in the living room?"

Elizabeth: "He's watching the newspaper."


Me: "That's a cute My Little Pony."

Elizabeth: "No, it's my little pony."


We're gonna need a bigger chimney

Me: "We'll have to also remember to set out some carrots for Santa's reindeer to snack on."

Elizabeth: "Yes." [pause] "Do the reindeer... come into the house too?"

They make a taffy just for this purpose

(While playing a game, Elizabeth gets a major case of the giggles...)

Me: "OK, it's your turn. Go ahead & roll the dice."

Elizabeth: [still giggling] "I can't! I'm too laughy!"



Daddy: "What does your shirt say?"

Elizabeth: "It says: 'Wah-Ka-Mee Preschool!'"


This girl is not even 15 years old!

Grama: "I love the color red. That's my favorite color."

Elizabeth: "I know. You told me that hundreds of times."

Good Question

"Why do moths fly?"


Insult du jour

"You dumb cereal."

In which the tables are turned

(While driving...)

Me: "When you're bigger, I'll teach you to drive a car, OK?"

Elizabeth: "I already know how to drive a car."

Me: "Oh... OK."

Elizabeth: "But, when I'm bigger, I want a new bed."

Me: "Why's that?"

Elizabeth: "Because I'm too big for my bed."

Me: "Of course! Yes, you can have a new bed when you're bigger."


"You know what I want when I'm bigger? A bigger house."

Elizabeth: "Why?"

Me: "Because we're too big for our house."

Elizabeth: "I don't want a new house."

Me: "But, it might be fun to have a bigger house...?"

Elizabeth: "Well... we'll see, OK?"


Insult du jour

"You sloppy egg."

Preschooler One-Liners

"You've got mail! Check out it!"


He's pretty good

Daddy: "Elizabeth, are you going to write a letter to Santa & let him know what you'd like for Christmas?"

Elizabeth: "I think Santa has an idea."



(While reading a famous book...)

Me: "Would you eat them in a box? Would you eat them with a fox?"

Elizabeth: "Is the fox going to eat the green eggs & ham?"

Me: "Yes, I think so."

Elizabeth: "What do foxes eat?"

Me: "Probably small animals like rabbits."

Elizabeth: "And maybe porcupines!"


Preschooler One-Liners

"...and that's how the game is played."



(While driving to preschool for picture day...)

Me: "Teacher Vicki's probably going to ask if you brought your smile today."

Elizabeth: "But... my smile is on me... already!"


The definition of On Purpose

Elizabeth: "Can I stand on your back?"

Me: "OK, go ahead.... just don't jump, OK?"

Elizabeth: "OK. But, I'll probably accidentally do that."


Preschooler One-Liners

(Very dramatically... )

"I shall now make the magic apple..."

[puts blanket over it]



Yes, we can.

(While driving to preschool, listening to NPR, Mommy lets out a nervous sigh...)

Elizabeth: "What?"

Sarah: "Oh, it's just Obama speaking. He's trying to help people."

Elizabeth: "Why do people... not want Obama... to help people?"

Sarah: "I don't know. I want him to help people."

Elizabeth: "Me too."


We make a lot of deals

(Driving home one evening...)

Elizabeth: "I'm so hungry!"

Me: "I thought your tummy hurts."

Elizabeth: "Nope. I want a cheeseburger."

Me: "Oh, I don't know... maybe not tonight."

Elizabeth: "But, I want one! OK, I have a deal. Let's go to Burgerville, and if they have cheeseburgers we will get one! And, if they don't have cheeseburgers we'll go home! And, you'll make me a cheeseburger! How 'bout that?"

Me: "I cannot argue with that deal."


You are Beetles with an 'A'...

(All of us listened to a lot of Beatles on 09/09/09. KINK played their entire catalog all day long, in celebration of a Beatles video game being released or whatever. They were on the radio, when.....)

Grama: "Isn't this great? It's the Beatles!"

Elizabeth: "Oh yeah! I like the Beatles."

Grama: "Me too!"

Elizabeth: "That's my favorite bug... and I like ladybugs, too."


One of these two things is the best advice I could ever hope to receive.

(Sayin' good-bye for the day...)

Elizabeth: "Bye, Mommy!"

Me: "Bye, have a nice day!"

Elizabeth: "Don't get pooped on!"

Me: "What?!"

Elizabeth: "...by any cats or dogs."

Me: "Oh... OK, I'll try not to."

Elizabeth: "And, don't see any trucks."

Me: "OK."

Elizabeth: "Those are two things I don't want you to do."

Me: "I promise. Thank you."



Daddy: "You're going to preschool & pretty soon you'll be four! We don't want you to grow up so fast..."

Elizabeth: "Yeah! I want to get big! So I can cook... and do stuff! I want to get big."


A lot to look forward to

(While watching Grama cut up some chicken for that night's dinner...)

Elizabeth: "Oh! That looks SO good. I think when I'm bigger, I will like to eat that very much!"

Well, sort of

(One night, as I attempted to add the repetoire of yogas we do before bed (i.e. 'puppy yoga,' 'frog yoga,' 'flower yoga' etc.) and also after a great game of 'Cootie'....)

Me: "Tonight, we're going to do Cootie Yoga!"

Elizabeth: "Cootie Yoga."

Me: "Yes..."

Elizabeth: "....you...put yourself together."


Of Epic Proportions

(Discussing the tractors, diggers, & dump trucks that have been working behind our house this summer)

Elizabeth: "I'm glad my trucks didn't take my slide when they dug that big hole..."

Me: "Yeah, we moved it out of the way."

Elizabeth: "...because that would be a problem."

Soccer Drills


Too much

(After Mommy sang a song Elizabeth had never heard before...)

Me: "Did you like that song?"

Elizabeth: "Yes... but, don't sing it again. That will be too much."




You never know what 'Ampa will say next!

(Before going over to Grama & Grampa's, Elizabeth put on a nice dress...)

Elizabeth: "I wonder what 'Ampa will say!"

Me: "He'll probably say something like, 'that's a cute dress.'"

Elizabeth: "Or maybe he will say something different!"


Not to be rude, but....

(Picking up Elizabeth from a playdate with Grama & Grampa)

Elizabeth: "Did you bring me a treat?"

Me: "Yes...it's in the car."

Elizabeth (to Grampa): "I.... I want to go home now."


The return of Kermit?

Elizabeth: "Guess what! I found another frog in my backyard!"

Me: "Really?"

Elizabeth: "Yeah! A teeny, weeny... heeny... BIG frog!"

Lost in translation

(While driving...)

Me: "We're almost to Sunriver!"

Elizabeth: "What?!"

Me: "We're almost to Sunriver."

Elizabeth: "Oh... I thought you said... tree!"


Baby Kermit comes to visit

(In the backyard one evening)

Elizabeth: "LOOOK!! LOOOOOOK!!!! LOOOOOOK!!"




Good Karma

In the bathtub, while handing me a cup full of water and washcloth.

Elizabeth: "Here you go. It's a present."

Me: "Oh, thank you. Have I been a good girl?"

Elizabeth: ".....What you said?"

Me: "I said, have I been a good girl to get such a great present?"

Elizabeth: "Yes, you are a good Mommy, so you get this present."


Cut to the chase

While watching a Disney Treasury about Goofy

"Leonard Maltin?! Gimme cartoons!"


Toddler One-Liners

"I love all the dinosaurs in the world!"


Happiness & Joy for a 3yo

(On our way to Salmon Street Fountain one warm day last week...)

Elizabeth: [looks at her pink Tinkerbell watch]

Me: "What time does your watch say?"

Elizabeth: "It says: WATERPARK TIME!"


Of course, green!

While driving...

Elizabeth: "What's coming out of that car?"

Me: "Steam."

Elizabeth: "Someday... I want to get a car that makes steam!"

Me: "OK!"

Elizabeth: "A green car... with three seats."

Me: "And, who's going to ride in your car?"

Elizabeth: "Grama, and Grampa, and Mommy, and Daddy, and Grama, and Me, and... [trails off]"

Me: "and, who else?"

Elizabeth: "No."


Promises, promises

After all the water was gone, spit, and spilled out of her little cup, Elizabeth asks for more water.

Elizabeth: "I want more water, please!"

Me: "Do you promise not to spill it?"

Elizabeth: "No."

Me: "I mean, will you spill it?"

Elizabeth: "I'll try not to."

Me: "Do you promise?"

Elizabeth: "I promise to try not to spill it."


Toddler One-Liners

"I'm the boss of flushing the potty."


Toddler One-Liners

"Are you grossed-up?"

Watch out James Beard Awards

Elizabeth: "I'm making you dinner!"

Me: "Oh, what's for dinner?"

Elizabeth: "Soup with tomatoes, broccoli, beans, sprinkles, and chocolate mustard."


Toddler One-Liners

"And what will happen if I don't flush?"


Soap Yoga

(After all the water had drained out of her bath...)

Elizabeth: "I wanna do Yoga!"

Me: "Ok!"

Elizabeth: "Now... in the bath."

Me: "Um, no. Rule #1 of yoga is: we don't do it in the bathtub."

Elizabeth: "But, I wanna do Soap Yoga."



"I don't want my burrito cut into pieces."


In which we get specific

(On Elizabeth's third birthday)

Me: "When are you going to go to bed tonight?"

Elizabeth: "One Thirty Eight."


Well, I guess if a cow can jump over it, then...

(While driving one evening)

Elizabeth: "The Moon! ... What do moons eat?"

Me: "Um. I don't think the moon eats anything."

Elizabeth: "I think so. I think so... Moons eat."

Me: "What do you think they eat?"

Elizabeth: [Without even a pause] "Fish."


For the Soul

(While pretending to cook dinner)

Elizabeth: "Here, have a fork!"

Me: "What are we having for dinner?"

Elizabeth: "Chicken noodle... chicken noodle... chicken... hot noodle soup."


Toddler One-Liners

"How'd that happen?"


Quite logical

(While Grama & Elizabeth gather up a few snacks to take downstairs to play on the computer.)

Grama: "Is that enough green beans?"

Elizabeth: "Yeah"

Grama: "What if you run out?"

Elizabeth: "Then I just say 'Grama. Get me some more green beans.'"


Toddler One-Liners

"You wanna play trains?"


Fun = Toys

Me: "Wanna go to Trader Joe's today? It's a pretty fun place."

Elizabeth: "Has toys?"

Me: "...no...it has food!"

Elizabeth: "Oh...toy food?"


A Snake's Snack

(While reading a book, we come across a picture of Kaa the Snake, from Jungle Book.)

Elizabeth: "Oh! Look at that snake!"

Me: "Yeah! I see him."

Elizabeth: "Maybe he needs food. What... what do snakes eat?"

Me: "Well, they eat little animals. Like mice 'n' stuff."

Elizabeth: "Yeah... that would be good for a snake."


"And chocolate milk!"